The Absolute Essential: Understanding and Practicing Sexual Consent

At Moanr, the sexual social contract is the cornerstone of what sexual wellness is. Sexual consent is a key pillar to sexual wellness . Sexual consent isn't just a stuffy legal term; it's basically the golden rule for healthy, respectful, and genuinely good sexual experiences. In a world that's thankfully wising up to everyone's right to control their own body, knowing and practicing consent is super important. It's all about clear chats, respecting each other, and making sure everyone involved feels safe and totally into what's happening.

So, what exactly is consent, and why is it such a big deal?

What Even Is Sexual Consent?

At its heart, sexual consent is a "yes!" that's given freely, excitedly, and keeps on going when it comes to getting intimate. Let's break down those key ideas:

• Given Freely: This means no pressure, no nagging, no guilt trips, and definitely no threats. If someone feels like they have to say yes, it's not real consent.

• Enthusiastic: Consent isn't just not saying "no." It's a definite, "Heck yeah!" It's about clearly showing you're eager and willing, not just going along with it.

• Ongoing: Consent isn't a one-time stamp. You need it for the entire time you're being intimate. Someone can say yes to one thing but not another, and they can change their mind anytime, for any reason, even if things have already started. A "yes" to kissing doesn't automatically mean "yes" to anything else, and a "yes" at the start can become a "nope" five minutes later.

• Specific: Saying yes to one type of sexy time doesn't mean you've agreed to everything else. Kissing? Great. But that doesn't automatically mean anything more.

When "Yes" Isn't Really a "Yes"

It's just as important to know when someone can't actually give consent. This includes times like:

• When someone's out of it: If they're passed out, asleep, or too drunk or high to know what's going on.

• When there's a big power difference: If one person is in a position of power over the other (like a boss/employee, teacher/student, doctor/patient), it can mess with whether consent is truly free.

• When someone's underage: If someone is younger than the legal age of consent (which varies, but is usually 16 or 18), they can't legally consent.

• When they're pressured or forced: Like we said, any kind of manipulation, threats, or intimidation just makes consent vanish.

Why Is Consent Such a Big Deal?

1. Your Body, Your Rules: Everyone has the right to decide what happens to their own body and who they get intimate with. Consent protects that basic right.

2. Stops Sexual Assault: If it's not consensual, it is sexual assault. Full stop. Clear, excited consent is the only way to make sure everyone's into what's happening and respects each other.

3. Builds Trust and Awesome Relationships: When you're open and honest about consent, it builds trust, respect, and deeper connections with your partner. It shows you really care about their boundaries and well-being.

4. Makes Experiences Good for Everyone: Intimate moments should feel good and positive for everyone involved. Without consent, they can be super traumatic and totally mess with someone's sense of safety.

5. It's the Law: More and more, laws are getting super clear about consent. Knowing and practicing it keeps everyone safe legally too.

How to Be a Consent Champion

Being good at consent is actually pretty simple, and it mostly comes down to talking it out:

• Ask Clear Questions: Don't just guess, ask! "Are you cool with this?" "Wanna take things further?" "Is this feeling good?" "What are you in the mood for?"

• Look for an Enthusiastic "YES!": Don't just wait for a "no." You want active, spoken, and excited agreement. Silence, hesitation, or not putting up a fight is not a yes.

• Respect "No" (and "Maybe" and Silence): A "no" always means "no," even if it's just in their body language or they seem unsure. "Maybe" or hesitation also means "no" or "not right now." If there's any doubt, stop and check in!

• Keep Checking In: As things progress, keep asking! "Does this still feel good?" "Still having fun?"

• Watch Body Language (But Still Ask!): While actually asking is key, also pay attention to how they're acting. Are they relaxed and into it, or tense and pulling away? If you're ever unsure, just ask!

• Understand They Can Change Their Mind: Someone can totally change their mind at any point. If they do, stop right away, no questions asked, no complaining. Their decision is final.

A clear yes is the only yes. Enthusiastic consent is sexy!

Sexual consent isn't some fuzzy, complicated thing; it's pretty black and white. It's all about open chats, respecting each other, and making sure every intimate moment is something everyone genuinely wants and enjoys. By being consent champions, we're all helping to create a safer, more respectful, and fairer world for everyone.

A clear yes is the only yes. Enthusiastic consent is sexy!